Are You Really Here?

What if instead of chasing stimulation, we practiced tuning in?

Welcome, I’m Tristan. As a health and wellness coach, I write about the intersections of health, mindset, and human connection—blending personal storytelling with practical tools.

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Welcome to 2025

A waiting room full of people, heads down, unable to sit with their thoughts.

A generation of men—disconnected, silent, but never truly alone—because their phone is always there, ready to excite, to entertain, to numb, to replace.

A gym packed with bodies, yet everyone exists in their own world, headphones in, conversation out.

A dinner table where friends gather, yet half the table is somewhere else— thumbs scrolling through another life, missing the one in front of them.

A couple in bed, inches apart yet miles away. The glow of their screens the only thing illuminating the room. No words exchanged, no hands held.

A sunset, breathtaking, yet viewed through a screen as someone scrambles to capture it instead of experiencing it.

We are more connected than ever, yet lonelier than before.

What if instead of chasing stimulation, we practiced tuning in?

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Tune in, TASTING..

The metallic aftertaste of cheap coffee,
clinging to the back of your tongue.

Or each bite of cinnamon pastry,
contrasted by each sip of bitter, rich espresso.

Tune in, FEELING..

Two fingertips rub together,
ever so gently,
that the ridges become prominent.

The subtle breath-in, breath-out,
no matter the cadence or rhythm.

That rage which bubbles,
when a glass slips
and shatters.

Tune in, SMELLING…

The nostalgic scent of Springtime,
as freshness bombards the nostrils.

The aroma of old books in a library,
with tales older than America itself.

The unmistakable stench of a forgotten gym bag,
damp and lingering.

Tune in, HEARING..

Your partners voice,
trying to really understand.
Not listening to respond,
but with full attention and intention.
Noticing the color of their eye(s),
the tonality of their voice,
the micro-expressions of their brow.
You give them the gift,
of being heard.

Tune in, SEEING…

The wide array of colors, textures, and nuance,
that would inspire nothing but awe,
if you only made the room for them.

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Reflections

In a moment when you’d normally reach for stimulation, pause. Observe what rises to the surface with curiosity.

What happens in the body when you sit in a waiting room without your phone? When you exercise in silence at the gym, no music filling the space? When you’re fully present at the dinner table, no distractions pulling you away? Or in those quiet moments before bed—or first thing in the morning—when reaching for a screen feels automatic?

We have a superpower on our hands: awareness. Yet we use it to numb discomfort.

I’d argue if you can’t feel the ‘yuck’, chances are you can’t feel the ‘yum’ either.

At first this takes practice. Eventually it becomes second nature.

We are hardwired for presence. Modern technology is taking this away from us.

We must be vigilant in where we place our attention.

After all, it may be the most important thing within our control.

Photo by Adi Goldstein on Unsplash

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About Tristan

Tristan is a health & wellness coach with a background in psychology and behavior change. He believes that everyone has the capacity to reconnect with their purpose, and with the right support, can create a life that brings them joy, clarity, and well-being.

How You Can Connect

1-on-1 Coaching: If these messages resonate with you and you’re exploring what change could look like, let’s talk. I work with men who are ready to reconnect with themselves, move from stagnation to purpose, and feel heard in the process.
Book a free 30-minute discovery session here.

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